Yesterday was Hard

We found out yesterday that our friend had her little girl Sunday night. She was 6lbs 3ozs. The cool thing is that her mom gave her the same middle name we were going to give her... "Grace". Yesterday was hard though... because, had everything gone the way we wanted, we would have been driving to pick her up from the hospital last night. We would have brought home our beautiful new daughter last night, and instead of sitting here at work today thinking about her and what her future holds, I would be holding her and kissing her sweet face. But, the key point in that thought, is that it is where we would be if things had gone OUR way instead of GOD's way. And the one thing we have heard over and over is that God has a plan in all of this, and His ways are not our ways. His plan is to prosper us, and not to harm us. His plan is to give us hope and a future. So today, I am clinging to that plan, His plan!! Praise you Lord for being in control!

When God Closes a Door.......

Well, our biggest fear during this process was realized this week... The Agency we are working will attempted to contact the birthfather to talk with him about the birthmom's adoption plan. He didn't say much except that his lawyer would be contacting the Agency lawyer.... which she did 30 minutes later. Apparently he was already building a case to not only stop the adoption, but also to fight the birthmom for custody of the baby girl. I don't really know what this guy is thinking right now... He is a single guy, who lives several hours away from where the birthmom and baby will be, has been absent for most of this pregnancy, and has no means to raise a baby. My heart grieves for this poor baby girl!! She is going to grow up in a broken home, being carted back and forth between birthparents. I know God's plan is to prosper and not to harm.... but it is hard to see that in this situation.

At this point, the agency is no longer pursuing an adoption case. They don't want to do anything that could damage the birthmom in a custody battle. That in itself is frustrating as well!! This woman, after being abandoned by the man who got her pregnant (and who wanted her to have an abortion), put her baby first, and chose to place her in a loving home where she could be raised by a mom and dad. Now, 3 weeks before she is due, he shows up and tries to use that against her, saying she didn't want the baby so he should get her. What is this world coming to where a woman can be praised for having an abortion because she exercised her "right to choose", yet be burned at the stake for choosing LIFE for her baby, and wanting to put it up for adoption.

I am frustrated at the situation.... but, at the same time, my hope is in the LORD, and I know that there is a sweet little baby that He has in mind for us. Please join me in prayer for our sweet friend, a woman who is preparing to fight, once again, for her baby girl, and who only wants the best for her. Pray that God would give her strength and courage during the next few weeks as she prepares to deliver her baby, and fight the father for her at the same time!

The Waiting Game

Well, we have completed just about everything needed on our end to make this adoption possible. All the paperwork is filled out, the home study is done, the TB tests and blood work are complete..... now we wait.

If you know me very well, you know that waiting is not my thing. I like to take charge and get things done when and how I want them done. So sitting here, waiting for a phone call, wondering if this is really going to happen, hoping we have done everything right, is driving me crazy!!! I had three different people tell me the same thing last week... now is the time to "be still, and know that He is God". So, that is what I'm trying to do.

Our potential birthmom is scheduled for induction the first week of November, so we have three weeks at the longest to wait. The hardest part about waiting is the unknown. Is she going to change her mind, is the dad going to contest, is this really what God wants us to do?? All these questions run through my head. We are going to meet the birthmom on Tuesday, and I am super nervous! Will she call and cancel, will she like us, will I say the wrong thing to her? So many questions!!!! Please pray with us that God would calm my anxious heart, and give me a peace about his plan for us! Pray that God would make His path so clear to us, the birthmom, the birthfather, and the agency, that all would be of one mind and spirit!

I leave you with that for now... there is so much more I could tell right now, but just thinking about it scares me!

God Provides!!

It seems lately that God has been laying everything need for this adoption at our feet.... which I find ironic since we laid it at His feet first! Last Friday we travelled out of town for our first in-person interview with the adoption agency. We were about 30 minutes away from the agency when we got a call that the birthmom we had been somewhat working with was ready to talk with the agency more. Although she had contacted our agency once before, she was not ready to talk much about adoption. I think everything is very overwhelming to her right now... and I can't even begin to understand what that must be like for her. The agency had tried to touch base with her a few time the week before, but she wasn't answering or returning calls. Our friend wanted to make sure that when her friend called the agency on Friday that one of the directors would be available to talk with her since she was ready. I told her we knew for a fact that the director would be there at that time because we were scheduled to be interviewing with her then! Talk about God's timing! After our initial interview they sent us directly across the hall to start our 1st home study interview. They wanted to kill two birds with one stone since things seemed to be moving forward. When that interview was over, we were informed that they happened to have an open spot for 1 more couple at the adoption seminar they were hosting the next day (Saturday). We were so excited to be able to attend it since it is one of two mandatory seminars we have to attend. The seminar was amazing and offered incredible insight into what these birthmoms are going through. Our hearts broke as Tim and I thought of what it would have been like to hand our little Bug over for someone else to raise. These women who choose life for their babies are truly strong women! One the way home from the conference Saturday, our friend called again and said our birthmom was ready to see a picture of our family, so she forwarded her the pictures we had sent a while ago that they were holding on to until she was ready. I was so nervous!! What if she doesn't like us, what if she doesn't think its fair that we already have a biological child when there are thousands of couples struggling with infertility, ton of thoughts and fears were running through my head. Within 15 minutes she replied back with the sweetest message and a picture of herself.... talk about God easing my worries! On Sunday we got the call that she was going to overnight her intake packet to the agency the next day, and felt like God had led her to the family He had in mind for her baby!

This week we began all the paperwork required for adoption through this agency. We had to fill out the official application, schedule a fire inspection, environmental inspection, CPR class, physicals for all three of us (and Cooper too), make copies of tax returns, floor plans of our house, college transcripts, and a million other things. We scheduled Cooper's vet visit... but we were anxious about the cost. Vets aren't cheap these days, and when we are trying to scrape together every last penny to afford an adoption it was an expense we were not happy to incur. A couple days before Cooper's appointment, Tim was given a $100 Visa gift card as thanks for his contribution to a project he was on at work. That gift card covered the entire vet bill, with just enough left over for a Chick-fil-A ice cream cone! Then came the fire and environmental inspection... we were told to be prepared to pay several hundred dollars between the two for odds and ends that needed to be checked. This morning I called the inspector our agency recommended to see if he could recommend someone in our town (he was located a few hours away). He told me to pull up the Texas Real Estate Commission website and do a search for inspectors in my town. He also told me it might be really hard to find someone since most inspectors didn't do environmental inspections. When I pulled up the site, 1 name really stood out to me... it seemed really familiar. I googled the guy and found his picture which also looked really familiar. I called Tim into the room and he confirmed my suspicions.... this guy was in our Sunday School class and played on Tim's church league softball team!!! I gave him a quick call and he was at our house within 15 minutes. We passed the inspection, and when the time came to pay he told us we didn't owe him ANYTHING!!! He was adopted too and was just glad to help! PRAISE THE LORD! The fire inspector came out a couple hours later and we passed that too (and we only had to pay $45)!

We still have a lot to do, and as with any adoption things can always change last minute. But, if I have learned anything this past week, it is that the Lord takes care of His children, and He can move in a mighty way! TO GOD BE THE GLORY, GREAT THINGS HE HATH DONE!!